The smart watch’s vibration wakes me up, I don’t bother to open my eyes, and reach the watch and turn its bezel to stop the vibration. Rolling on the bed I bump to my wife, she does not move, I’m happy that I didn’t wake her up.

That would be good if I could sleep a little more. I still feel so tired. I hear cars roaring from the half open window. It’s mid summer and the weather is getting warmer. Our bed room is faced toward a crowded highway and with this heat we can’t close the windows.

The watch starts to vibrate again. I can’t believe ten minutes has been passed so quickly. I hardly open my eyes, then reach out to my watch and try to enter the pin to stop the snooze.

  • “Pin error” watch shows on the screen. I try again.

  • “Pin error”! I hate it when I can’t enter four digits correctly on this tiny screen.

  • “Pin successful”.

Finally I did it. Now I’m too awake to go back to sleep again, sigh!

I brush my teeth and take a shower, then I look at my watch. It’s 06:50. I hear someone calling me.

  • John, JOHN …

It’s my wife, her name is Kathrine, because of the shower noise, I didn’t hear her before and now she’s loudly shouting my name.

  • Yes honey
  • It’s getting late, please wake up Paul.

Paul is our son, he is 6 years old and is going to kindergarten. He usually wakes up before us but last night he insisted to play some silly games till late night.

  • Ok honey!

I head to the living room, I remove phone from the charger and tap it over the speaker. The “connected” sign appears on the phone and I play some music, it feels a bit too rhythmic for early morning but that’s the easiest way to wake up everyone.

Then I head to Paul’s room, roll up the blinds and sun rays get into the room. He rolls over to avoid the sun light. I leave the room without saying anything.

A few minutes later, everyone is at the breakfast table. I look at my watch its 7:30 I’m thinking to catch 7:45’s train. I dress up to leave the home. Paul runs after me and asks all sort of silly questions, it’s getting late.

  • Daddy will bring something sweet from the office, if I could catch the next train.
  • K chocolate? OK daddy?
  • Yes, sure.

“Don’t promise to buy chocolates, Paul had enough yesterday.”, Kathrine says out loud.

  • OK, honey.

“Mommy is not my friend, daddy is my friend.” Paul responds.

I smile and close the door. I put the headsets on, tap my phone to it and hearing it says ‘connected’. I start playing “The Goal” audio book.

While walking to the train station I’m thinking to myself why recently I have no courage to wake up and go to work. I used to love what I do but things are changing now. While I’m at the station the board shows the next train arrives in 4 minutes. Fortunately it’s not late today.

The thoughts start to flow again, what’s really wrong with me? Why I can’t focus anymore. I joined “WOT Commerce” about a year ago as a head of operations. We are an eCommerce company focused on aggregating all sort of cool tech wearables and IoT so our users can find various products in one place. The business model is commission based. For every redirect to the device’s web shop or home page we get paid a fee. The business looks promising specially in the rapidly growing IoT and wearables’ market.

Since the last round of investments the numbers started to fluctuate and now there are some rumors around that we are not going to hit the revenue target of this year anymore which is in nearly six months. That bothers me all day long. The problem is I could not figure out what the problem exactly is. We have lots of strong developers, the most recent technology and the motivation to do these stuff.

Train stops and I try find my way through a huge crowed. Now I’m out and can take a deep breath, it felt like I was choking. The audio book says “chapter 3” but I can’t remember I did hear even a word of it. Damn, it seems I was too drawn in my thoughts. I stop the book and play the Nickleback’s album No Fixed Address.

Then I walk down to the street, 15 minutes later I enter the office. It’s 8:30 and office looks empty. “It seems no one wants to leave the bed early”. I put my backpack by my desk and head to the coffee machine.

  • Good morning, John

He’s Dave, he is a software developer, he is a very bright guy and always armed with a Nerf gun. He works in a “Partner integration team”.

  • Morning Dave, how are you today?
  • I’m fine, how about yourself?
  • Not bad, not bad, could not sleep well last night, I have to dose up my espresso’s today.
  • Don’t drink too much.

I make a double shot cappuccino and head back to my desk, turn on my computer. It’s on standby but surprisingly nothing shows up. Just a black screen, I look at the keyboard and press the caps lock button, does not lite up. It’s crashed again. I force reboot my laptop, I see the “Ubuntu” logo shows up and I smile again.

“Looks like the last update broke the sleep mode again!” I say it loudly.

“You have 12 new emails”, notification pops up.

Opening my mailbox with the title “HR Updates” catches my eyes, recently we got the news that someone is leaving at least twice a month. So naturally I think to myself who’s this time. She is Maryam the Iranian girl from the SEO team.

Recently employees turn over gone too the roof. The company is trying to compensate employees above the market rates. There are also lots of support and perks for the employees. At least one big party every quarter, free breakfast, a big coffee machines, fruit baskets everywhere. Pool tables and kickers. The best working equipments. Financial support for conferences and trainings. Still it feels like something bothers everyone. But I’m not sure yet what it is. Is this the same thing that causes even recently joined employees to leave?

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My notes and experiments with different technologies and tools. All information here is solely my personal thougths and does not relate to my employer's point of view in anyways.



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